Unexpressed gratitude letter
Gratitude is the sign of noble souls. ―Aesop
👥 Serves: 1 person, 11-25 people, 2-10 people
🎚 Difficulty: Hard
⏳ Total time: 61-120 minutes
🥣 Ingredients: Sheets of paper (1 per person), pens (1 per person), a group of people (optional)
🤓 Wholebeing Domains: Awareness, Discomfortability, Positive Emotion
💪 Wholebeing Skills: Gratitude, Grieving, Letting go, Peacefulness, Relief, Vulnera-bravery
Unexpressed gratitude letter
📝 Description
A healing activity to foster forgiveness and acceptance.
Writing gratitude letters can boost your happiness and sense of gratefulness in life. How about writing letters of gratitude where it has never been expressed before? Taking the time to share your appreciation to people (and situations) which you never thanked them for is even more powerful as it encourages you to make a conscious effort to be grateful, helping you rewire your brain word by word. Importantly, you can express gratitude to people both for positive and negative experiences. In fact, when we are able to appreciate the most hurtful and painful memories, we can truly accept, forgive, and heal.
This activity can be done individually or in a group. If the latter, we suggest having groups of no more than 8-10 people, so if there are more people, you can split into smaller groups.
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This recipe has been featured in our blog post “Wired for connection and belonging” published on tbd* on 12 February 2020.
👣 Steps
Step 1 – Write (30’)
Find a quiet place and take half an hour or so by yourself to write an unexpressed gratitude letter to someone. If in a group, tell everyone they should feel free to write the letter in whichever language they feel most comfortable with.
Step 2 – Share (60’)
Gather back as a circle and give the opportunity to anyone who feels comfortable, to read their letter out loud. Writing in itself is extremely healing, but reading it out loud to others is even more powerful. Remind everyone they do not have to share if they do not wish, and they can read in whichever language they wrote the letter in. If you are by yourself, read it out loud anyway and let the environment around you listen to your words.
Step 3 – Say thanks
[OPTIONAL] Only a few people will be ready for this last step, but for those who are, invite them to share their letter with the person it is addressed to, e.g. mailing it to them, inviting them to meet up, or whichever other rituals work for you if it is not possible to reach out to this person.
Step 4 – Free time
Give people plenty of free time to do whatever they need to attend to their needs after this powerful experience.